Published on: June 6, 2025

Finding the Right Therapist: How to Know If It’s a Good Fit (And Why That Matters)

Starting therapy is a brave and personal decision. But once you’ve taken that first step, another important question often follows:

How do I know if I’ve found the right therapist?

It’s a valid question, and one we hear often. The truth is, therapy is not one-size-fits-all. Every therapist brings their own training, personality, and approach into the room. And every client brings their own needs, history, and preferences. What works for one person may not feel quite right for another.

At Therapy-Connection, we believe that the relationship between you and your therapist is one of the most important parts of the healing process. Research backs this up. Studies show that the quality of the connection between client and therapist is one of the strongest predictors of positive outcomes in therapy.

So how do you know when the fit is right?

What a Good Fit Can Feel Like

When therapy is working, it often feels like:

You can breathe a little easier after the session
You feel safe, even when talking about hard things
You don’t feel judged for your thoughts or emotions
You leave feeling understood, not just analyzed
You feel respected and supported, not talked down to or pressured

You don’t have to feel a spark right away, and it’s completely normal to take time to warm up.
But you should feel a sense of openness and possibility, even if things are still unfolding.

Therapy Is a Relationship, Not a Transaction

Take our former client, Serena. She started therapy after a tough breakup but quickly realized she didn’t feel comfortable being fully honest in her sessions. She didn’t dislike her previous therapist, but she often found herself saying what she thought was “appropriate” instead of what was true. When she came to Therapy-Connection, she was cautious at first, but after a few sessions with one of our clinicians, she noticed she was exhaling more, laughing more, and letting herself say things she had never said out loud before. That shift made all the difference.

Or consider Malik, who had been in therapy years ago and left because he felt like he was being lectured rather than heard. When he returned to therapy with us, we focused on making sure he felt ownership of his process. He helped set the tone, pace, and direction of each session, and that autonomy helped him build trust more naturally.

Questions to Ask Yourself After a Session

If you’re wondering whether your therapist is a good fit, here are a few gentle questions you can reflect on after a session:

Did I feel emotionally safe, even when things got hard to talk about?
Was I able to be honest about what I was thinking or feeling?
Did my therapist listen without judgment or assumptions?
Do I feel like they respect who I am and what matters to me?
Am I looking forward to continuing, even if I still feel unsure?

If your answer to most of these is yes, that’s a promising sign. If your answer is no or unclear, that doesn’t mean therapy won’t work for you. It may simply mean you haven’t found the right person yet.

If It’s Not the Right Fit, That’s Okay

Sometimes the therapist and client just don’t click—and that’s not a failure on anyone’s part. Finding the right therapist is a deeply personal process. You deserve to work with someone who makes you feel safe, respected, and understood.

At Therapy-Connection, we encourage open communication about the fit. If something doesn’t feel right, we want to hear about it. And if we’re not the right match, we’re always happy to help connect you with someone who might be a better fit for your needs.